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Almost a year ago, our first litter rescued after I opened Kitten Associates, came to my home to be fostered. One of the kittens, I named, Sugar Pie. She was a complete love bug. Healthy. Hearty. Happy. It was very tough to let her go, but geez. I was just starting a rescue. Not a good time for a “foster fail!”
A couple, with three very big dogs, wanted to adopt Sugar, but I balked, at first. Jennifer and I did a home visit. The couple assured me that Sugar would be safe, that their dogs were very well behaved and they would not DARE harm the kitten. Of course I didn't believe it.
Then they told me about how they used to have a pet CHICKEN that lived with them, too and the dogs didn't bother the walking meat on two legs (Chicken!). They showed me PHOTOS! They said they'd want to get another chicken after their new kitten had time to adjust to the dogs.
I gave them some challenges, thinking they would give up, but they did what I asked. No problem. The dogs really were well behaved and I had to go with my gut. These were great people and I had to give it a chance. Sugar had the entire second floor to herself. The dogs could not get up there, so she could have time to get used to them and still feel safe.
The family has been great about keeping me updated. After Sugar was adopted, they re-named her, Jasmine. Every time I got an update, I'd see a photo that would leave me speechless. Last time it was of Jas sitting on the arm of a chair. Her mom had food on a plate and she was surrounded by the three huge dogs. They all wanted a treat, but clearly, they were all relaxed and getting along.
The most recent update included photos of their new CHICKEN! Along with photos of Jasmine, trying to figure out what the heck is going on. I think it's completely nuts, but I have to admit, when I was ten, I had a pet chicken and two cats. Go figure.
Jas is doing great. She loves her doggie and CHICKEN! friends and she's grown into a lovely young lady. She's really getting fluffy and I hear she is a treasure and well loved. I'm very glad I took a leap of faith and adopted Sugar to this family. They're simply terrific and I wish I had more adopters as devoted to their furry offspring.
Three days ago, DoodleBug tested POSITIVE for Feline Leukemia. I decided to have him re-tested right away, instead of waiting for two months. I wanted a confirmation that the first test was accurate.
Super Deb just called me with the results.
NEGATIVE!
NEGATIVE!
NEGATIVE!
Okay, DoodleBug had only one test, but I just wanted to be emphatic about the results! I am SO thrilled!!!!!!!!!! This means that it may have been a false positive. To be sure, Doods will have to be STUCK in the bathroom for TWO MONTHS until we re-test him one more time, BUT it is very likely he is just FINE, thank you. And does NOT HAVE FELINE LEUKEMIA!
I think it's almost a given, that when something bad happens, we try to make sense of it. Give it a reason for being, so we can learn to accept it. Then there are times when it's just so bad, there is no sense to be made.
Yesterday afternoon, I called my Vet to see if Doodlebug was ready to be picked up. I had dropped him off that morning and he just needed some tests, a shot and a wellness exam. If you're going to do cat rescue, you must NEVER bring a cat into your home without it going to the Vet, FIRST. Considering all the creeping crud out there, you can't be too careful.
Doodle looked great, perky, nice weight. I didn't worry that anything was wrong with him, but when it took 6 minutes of being on hold to just find out a pickup time, I knew something was up. Instead of one of the Vet techs picking up the phone, it was Dr. Larry. His voice had a serious tone. Normally we would joke around, but not this time.
He didn't mince words.
Doodlebug tested POSITIVE for Feline Leukemia.
WHAT??!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!
I felt lightheaded, like I was going to faint. I tried to muster up the courage to ask him what this means. When I was a kid, two of our family's cats died from it. Dr. Larry said what I had heard from other folks who do rescue, that although it is a “strong positive,” that there is a CHANCE that in time, Doodle's immune system may kick in and he will re-test, negative. This result means he was EXPOSED to the virus, not necessarily that he HAS it. It's called, Primary Viremia. You can read more about it on Cornell's excellent resource guide for Feline Leukemia If so, there are no more concerns for this cat's future. If he re-tests positive, you have to wait and re-test again. All in all, I may have to wait for up to SIX MONTHS to really be sure one way or the other.
But Feline Leukemia is very contagious and fatal and I have an FIV+ cat with cancer and eight other cats in my house. What am I supposed to do now?
Do I have to EUTHANIZE Doodlebug? I could barely ask the question. I had to sit down. My legs went wobbly. I was in shock. I didn't want to know the answer.
I can barely even type that word: euthanize. The thought of me KILLING a KITTEN, when my life is devoted to SAVING their lives,? It's absurd! I would NEVER do that! How could I do such a thing? But what about my own cats? Does bringing Doodle into my home, mean a DEATH SENTENCE FOR MY OWN CATS?
We talked about isolation. Re-testing. Doodle does NOT have to be euthanized today, but it may have to happen at some point. IF he was at a shelter, guess what, he would be dead. I get it. This is not something you want around a lot of other cats.
But I was VERY WORRIED about bringing him into my home. I wished I had a separate building to bring my fosters now, more than ever, but I was stuck. At least I HAD a room to put him in that was isolated from the rest of the house.
I had figured Doodle would be in the blue bathroom (as we call it), for a few weeks, then I'd let him meet my cats and he could run around and have a good time until he got adopted. Now I may have lost that space for fosters until 2012!
I could make SURE Doodle was locked up, change clothes after I handle him and wash my hands well after each visit, too. If I could keep my own cats away, the Feline Leukemia virus does not live for more than a few hours in the environment, so as long as there are no shared dishes, litterpans or contact, it increases the odds my cats will be all right.
He will be ALONE in that bathroom for a very long time.
I hung up the phone and called out to Sam. I told him the news and I could see his shoulders slump as he processed the information. He had a crush on this little kitten, too. I could see it broke his heart. We spoke about our options, about what this might mean for our own cats and for Doodlebug. I started to cry, but I was late for a meeting and I had to figure out how to not be sad, be businesslike and deal with this later. I asked Sam what we should do. We had few options. Sam said; "We don't give up on him. That's what we do. I will go get him and bring him home.”
So now what I thought was going to be an easy rescue, has become much more complex. What I thought I could afford has become a challenge. The bathroom where Doodle will live is small and has a small window. I would like to buy Doodle a cat tree so he can sit up high and look out the window, as well as have a place to climb and a way to de-stress because it will have nice, tall sisal legs to scratch.
Doodle will also need more tests, a second, and possibly third ELISA (snap-test/ enzyme-linked immunosorbent assay) and first and possibly second IFA (indirect immunofluorescent antibody assay). I'm going to start fundraiser for him for his medical needs and to purchase a small cat tree.
I contacted Doodle's former owner and told him he must contact the person he got the kitten from and let them know the news and to get that cat tested for Feline Leukemia. I also told him that if he had Doodle around other cats, that those cats needed to be tested, too. I would have LIKED to tell him that I also would have appreciated it if he warned me that Doodle was trained to use a human's hand as a TOY and that he will haul off and bite and grab your arm or leg-a behavior I will be working to correct.
I didn't hear back from him. I'm not surprised. Doodle was on the road to becoming a very unpleasant cat to live with. You wouldn't be able to pet him without him getting excited and biting. When he weighs four pounds, it's one thing, but when he grows up, it won't be a lot of fun to have him around. I would bet money that this was the real reason they got rid of him-not that their kid was allergic, but that the kitten was growing too aggressive from how they mis-handled him.
All in all, I'd have to say that my first CT cat rescue under the Kitten Associates moniker was about as bad as it could be. I have to think that in trying to make sense of this, I had to save Doodle, so I can help him be a good kitty-citizen, learn to be gentle and give him all the tools to have every chance at being healthy and living a good life.
For the record, if there is one someone's keeping out there, I will never put Doodle down.
If he IS Feline Leukemia positive, then I will search the Earth until I find someone who will adopt him.
Please help us purchase a cat tree for Doodle and be able to continue to re-test him for Feline Leukemia for the next few months! You can use the ChipIn widget below or you can also mail a check to: Kitten Associates, Inc., P.O. Box 354, Newtown, CT 06470-0354. Put “Doodle” on the check so we know where the funds should be spent. Your donation IS tax deductible. Thank you!
I get emails and calls every day about cats needing a new home. Their owners give them up because they are suddenly allergic to them, or they're moving and their new landlord doesn't allow cats (so why MOVE THERE?!) or they've fallen on tough times or they just found the cat on the street. Whatever the reason, they're out there. So many there's no way I could even make much of a dent by saving one cat, but heck, it makes a difference to that cat.
I admit it. I was missing MacGruber and Polly. The house is silent without them running around. Okay, I don't yell much any more either, since the two of them were pretty good at getting into trouble, but I MISS it, you know? Also, my own cat, Blitzen is very sluggish and sad. He has no one even close to his age to play with and he just follows me around the house now.
So I felt weak. I got an email from our local rescue group mailing list. It was a copy of a Craigslist ad for a Free kitten, 2-3 months old. Litterbox traiend. That's it. No other info. Craigslist doesn't allow postings like this so they aren't up for very long-which means, the contact info of the person who wrote the ad, is not valid for more than a day or so. The rescuers try to intercept these ads and get those animals help because the people giving the cats away are giving them away, unvetted, not spayed or neutered!!!, and to just ANYONE, so those cats could be harmed or worse.
Many times these cats are kicked outside to fend for themselves if the ad doesn't work. So, I replied to the ad. Did they need help with the kitten? A few days passed. I got an answer. YES, they needed help.
Oh dear, now I actually have to do something! Okay...my foster room is booked. Phil will be here from Georgia on Saturday. My only other space is my bathroom. I guess that will have to do. If this cat isn't as advertised or is nasty, I might have him here for a long time. It's very tough to take on something without having any idea of the outcome. You're responsible for a LIFE. YOU have to choose, if this cat can be adopted and what the heck to do if it's a mess!
In a month, I'll have Amberly's family here, then The Angel Babies, so this little kitten BETTER be adoptable and I better be able to get him neutered in time-knowing that the S/N Clinic near us always books out this time of year-at least a month. Oh boy...well...It's a risk worth taking, I think.
Then there was the family...I have to say dealing with them did not go smoothly at all. First, they blew us off after we went to all the trouble to make a vet appointment, get the room ready, and get ourselves in the car to meet them, then they say they can't be there for 2 more hours! So we re-scheduled and while we were on the road, anyway, we went to Target to buy a new litter pan for the kitten.
Then they didn't want to sign the Surrender form, which would protect us should they ever want the cat back and find we had already adopted him to another family. That was announced in an email I got at 1am this morning. They said NO, we will just not bring the cat if we have to sign the paper.
So bleary-eyed and half asleep I had to try to "nicely" tell him in my reply, not to worry. That it was a common thing to sign off on and that it was just so that WE were not sued if THEY didn't like where the cat went after they gave it to us. At 8 am he wrote me back saying; OK, thanks for explaining. See you at 9:35 AM.” Yes, 9:35 AM, not 9:30 or 10...hmmm...odd.
Sam and I were both sure we would never see the kitten.
We pulled into the Park & Ride off I-84 to wait for the owner, who I didn't know anything about other than he had an Asian name, to bring the kitten. A car was already there waiting even though we were 15 minutes early. There were two Asian ladies in the car, one waved at me. I waved back. Their windows were open. I thought it was strange. I didn't see a cat carrier. I got out of the car and said hello. Turns out they waved at the person in the car BEHIND us and did not have the kitten! Oops. I live in a pretty much “New England Yankee” sort of demographic area so what were the odds we'd see another group fitting the same heritage as the owner of the kitten?
At 9:30 AM, an SUV pulled up. Definitely our guy. He got out of the car and smiled, then went to get the kitten. They had closed him up inside a small, covered CAT LITTER PAN. It was clean, but really? No holes in it to breathe? Sam took the litter pan and got in the car to transfer the kitten into our cat carrier. The guy gave me the paperwork signed and I signed it, too. I asked if there was anything I should know about and he, in a round about way, said the kitten peed on soft things when they first got him. Did they give him a litter pan? I don't know. Then he said he used the litter pan, but was weird about telling me if the cat pees on soft fabric that's on the floor, like a rug or cat bed. May have a litterbox aversion issue. Other than that, he said the kitten was fine.
He never told me the cat's name. He didn't give me any of the leftover food, if there was any. I asked him if they fed the cat. His mother said something in Chinese, not sure what, but he nodded at her and said the cat was fed breakfast. That was it. No remorse, no sadness, not even a goodbye to the kitty. No donation to provide for the cat's vet care, which I had asked for a few times. Oh well.
They left just a few minutes after they arrived. I got in the car and looked inside the cat carrier. That was it. I was “done.” What a sweet little face was looking at me from inside the carrier. When we got to Dr Larry's I took him out. He was purring. He was FLUFFY. He has a little white TIP on his stubby black fluffy tail! He didn't mind being held. His fur was very soft.
Sam almost whined at me. He wanted a turn holding the little guy! So we traded. He nibble at Sam's whiskers, then got a bit over excited so we put him back in the cat carrier. Lauren came out and we took the kitten out and put him on the countertop. He calmly explored this new place and I saw his butt. It was just the right amount of FLUFFY. He had that cute little butt-wiggle when he walked. Oh shit, I'm in trouble.
I know a lot of people who rescue cats and they often say to me that they think they're cat magnets because cats who need help, always seem to find them. My friend, Izzy, is one such person and recently she had to take quick action to save the lives of helpless neonatal kittens.
Izzy and her husband, Mark were helping bring in hay at the boarding farm where they keep their horses. While they were there she found out something that was was both heartbreaking and a true emergency.
At the boarding farm there was a tractor shed on the property. The owner found 5 newborn kittens without their mother. The owner figured the mama would come back, so she didn't worry about it. She checked on the kittens the next day, but no mama. For two days the kittens were left alone, not fed or kept warm. At less then a week old, without urgent care these kittens would perish.
She mentioned her find to her next door neighbor who said he'd shot and killed a white cat in his yard, worried she'd kill his ducklings. Without pity or concern, he ended her life, not realizing he may have also just ended the lives of five little kittens, as well.
The owner moved the kittens to her stable, hoping another feral mama would find them and care for the three boys and two little girls, but no help arrived...until Izzy got there.
Now Izzy has a few, ah cats, dogs, horses...well more than you can count on your fingers and maybe toes, so Izzy knows how to care for animals, but she's got her hands full already. She didn't bat an eye, or try to get out of helping these babies. One look at them and she was smitten. Each delicate creature was snow white, but by some comedic genetic twist, all but one has at least one black dot on their head. It's as if a cosmic force anointed them, marking them as ones to be saved. Izzy knew she had to move quickly, so she took the kittens and got them home where she began the difficult task of trying to warm them up get them FED. Time was of the essence!
Izzy and her husband, Mark, also a dedicated animal rescuer, helped tend to the kittens. The phone rang. It was the owner of the farm. They found a sixth kitten. He, too, looked like the others, but was strangely about a week older. He was alone and crying. Mark drove back to get him. They weren't going to turn their backs on kittens in such dire circumstances. The kitten was sick and probably starved. They put him in with the others, hoping for the best.
It was touch and go for a few long days. Izzy and Mark took turns feeding and helping the kittens void their bladder and bowels. At that age, the kittens can't even do that without help. It's a very difficult thing to do TIMES SIX. Every few hours the kittens were fed, cleaned, loved. Now was the time to pray and hope that they weren't too late, at least for some of them.
It's been two weeks and the kittens have survived so far. Each day they live is a big success for Izzy and Mark. They decided it was ok to go ahead and name the kittens.
They're squirming and crying and eating and doing all the things little kittens should do. Two of Izzy & Mark's own cats, have become surrogate mothers to the little ones, offering their own warmth and companionship, (though since they're spayed-no milk) that the kittens so desperately need. It's as if they knew, too, that these little angels needed them.
But what happens next? Izzy and Mark don't live in a big metropolitan area full of potential adoptesr and don't have resources to home so many kittens. Well, that's where I stepped in. I told Izzy I had her back. I didn't want her to fear having six extra cats. Even though I'll have Amberly and her five kittens by then, I'll find a room for these angel babies. I'm just part of the team that's going to get them to their forever homes. We're trying to right a heartbreaking wrong and perhaps in getting these kittens strong and adopted into great homes, we're honoring the spirit of their Mother, who truly is an angel now.
Can you help provide a small donation so we can pay for the Angel babies vet care? Your donation is Tax Deductible as the money goes to my 501(c)3 Non-Profit cat rescue, Kitten Associates, Inc.
You can use the ChipIn widget, above or mail a check to:
Kitten Associates, Inc., P.O. Box 354, Newtown, CT 06470. (make check out to: Kitten Associates and note "Angel Babies" on your check)
The kittens will need shots, to be spayed or neutered and microchipped. It's about $85/cat to do it here in CT, so we're just asking for the basics. If you can help, great! If not, you can help by sharing this with your friends. THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
Amberly's kittens are SIX WEEKS OLD! Time flies! Can you believe they were found in a nest under a tree? If you missed their AMAZING RESCUE, you can read about it HERE. Are these the SAME kittens? Is it possible they are NOT SICK? I don't even know what it's like to not have a kitten with upper respiratory to battle or something worse:::KNOCK WOOD::: anti-jinx!!!
I'm SO grateful that the kittens are doing so well and to make it even better, I swear EACH of them is more lovely than the last. Amberly made some very special kittens, that's for certain!
Today, instead of blathering on and on, let's just enjoy a multitude of images from a few weeks ago and more I just got yesterday-including some adorable videos! Grab a cup of coffee or tea and sit back and smile. It's a good day to smile!
Here are the babies! (make sure you scroll ALL the way to the end for the funniest photo, ever!)
It's too quiet in my home. There are NINE cats here. One of them, the mama to my foster kittens still needs to find a home. You'd think with nine cats there'd be some noise, but it's like we don't have any cats at all now that Polly and MacGruber have been adopted.
I knew that saying goodbye to them would be tough. After all, they've been with me for eight months. How can you not get attached over all that time? At first, after they left it was just like they were at the Vet for a day or two, that they would come back. It wasn't so bad to have a break from all the insanity-and trust me there was pretty much non-stop craziness here. They would race up and down the stairs at all hours. They'd explore everywhere and I'd find them on the top of the eight foot tall cat tree, fighting for who had control of the upper level, or they'd be passed out, upside down on the bed after furiously grooming each other. What I miss the most is that they'd often follow me around. Polly loved to sleep next to me in an elevated cat bed I have near my desk. It used to be just for Blitzen, but Polly took turns with him to be close.
Most of the time Polly couldn't even stay that close to me without having to crawl into my lap, walk up my chest to find a spot to sleep. Her coat was like the finest silk. I'd sit back from my work and just hold her and pet her.
It's weird how lonely it is without them. My own cats are mostly, at least six, if not ten years old. Blitzen is barely two and he is lonely as well. He and Mac used to run around and wrestle, then groom each other. I saw Blitzen go over to one of my other cats and give her one lick, she backed off, he turned away, defeated.
In two weeks I'm taking in Phil, the BIG adult ragdoll/DLH cat I rescued from Henry Co. a month or so ago. I know I'm going to love Phil, but he's not a kitten, either. Maybe he will keep Blitzen on his toes, if he ever even meets my guys. I'll have to keep him quarantined for a few weeks and by then I hope to have him adopted.
I realize I can easily take in some kittens that need help but I have to hold the space for Amberly and her kittens and I've promised to help another friend with her kittens, as well. They'll be here in a month. I just have to be patient. In the meantime, I am going to be sad. Missing my little munchkins, who I hear are doing well.
Mac is having a bit of a tough time adjusting and has become somewhat nervous in his new home, but Polly is ready to go, enjoys watching the birds and is very confident.
I was surprised to hear that Mac was having a tough time. He was nothing but confident here. Perhaps he smells the cat that used to live in the house before he got there? Perhaps his owners let him out of his room far too soon (after just a day). I hope Mac learns to relax and be calm and confident, as he was here. He hasn't eaten very well, which surprises me, too. Maybe we should just bring him back here?
Oh how tempted I am to just go get them both. I have to stop this. They're in a very good home and their new family will look after their every need. They even noticed that Mac was afraid of their ceiling fan, so they turned it off and will only run it slowly, until he gets used to it. That tells me they're paying attention to him and trying to help him be comfortable.
It's too early to worry. I feel confident it will work out in time. I just have to get this lump in my throat to dissolve. I miss them so much, but damn it, that's how it goes when you do rescue. I didn't realize how HAPPY having kittens made me. It really takes the blues away. How can you NOT smile when kittens are nearby? No wonder I miss them. And maybe, too, they miss me.
I'm very pleased to let you know that Amberly and her kittens are doing very well (:::knock wood:::). They're already starting to eat on their own and give their Mom a break. Each day they get a little bit chubbier and stronger...and more adorable!
Two more hours and the adopters will be here. I always try to spend the last bit of time with the cats before they go. I don't know why it matters because, in a way, they're already gone. I can't take enough photos, pet them enough, give them kisses and say goodbye enough times. Here comes that flippy feeling in my gut, like I'm going to fall and no one will catch me. Kinda like yesterday afternoon when I was vacuuming the stairs and I slipped on the hose, then fell down the steps and got a whopper of a “goose egg” on my arm.
From petfinder.com, the photo that made me fall in love and get "that feeling" this kitty needed me to rescue him.
It's bloody hot, even though I have the A/C running. The cats are flat pancakes, napping after gorging themselves on what may be their last meal with me. I worry they won't get what they like so I packed them a big bag of different kinds of grain free canned food. I'm pretending they're going on a trip and will be back in a few days. I guess I should get a clue and realize the trip will be longer than I can stand waiting.
Today is really about MacGruber. He was the “the one” this family wanted. Since they have no other animals, I insisted they either adopt a second cat from me or find a companion for Mac. He is far too affectionate with my cats to be an only cat. I think it would really hurt him. The family admitted that they were also smitten with Polly and after I spoke to them about the reasons why having two cats is better than one, they agreed and felt they could handle the additional cost of taking on a second cat.
Fortunately, Mac and Polly get along rather well. In the past few days, even moreso. Perhaps it's a sign?
Mac was the easiest rescue I've ever done. I saw him on Petfinder, knew he was in danger and had him pulled before his time was up. He went to live with Aunt Bobbie and she told me he was a doll. From the first moment, this cat was mellow, easy-going, and ready for anything. Weeks later, when he arrived at my home, he was the same way. He was completely unfazed by the long trip-1000 miles-or the fact that he was in a house full of other cats.
I intended on “properly introducing him” to my cats but it was clear he didn't need to wait. After two days he was playing with Blitzen and chillaxin' with us. His constantly burbled. He meow is very odd. He liked to talk to us about his day and when could he please have more food?
I looked at his surrender form and it only listed an address, no reason for why he was given up. I can't think of why anyone would let this cat go. His silly face always makes me smile. Okay, he chases after one of my cats who does not appreciate it so she freaks out, but we don't like her! I know that's so mean, but there's a long story there and it's not time to talk about her (but she knows who she is, PETUNIA!).
Mac has been here for as long as Polly. Sam and I often talked about adopting him ourselves. We feel the same about Polly. We know we're treading in dangerous water. We just can't do this. We need to let them go. This will be a great home for him and I already said no to a lot of applications on Mac that just weren't right. It's time.
What is today's lesson about letting go of a foster cat you adore? I don't have one. It sucks. How is that for a lesson? Just the truth. There's no sugar-coating it. Saying goodbye SUCKS. Seeing their little faces in the cat carrier as they leave my home, SUCKS. Missing their silly antics tonight when I want to sleep, may not suck that much, but I will miss them.
MackeyGee, as I call him, got way under my skin. I want to put hot pepper flakes on his tongue and make him act insane when the adopters get here. I want to put hot pepper flakes on MY tongue and act insane, too. But I can't. I just can't.
The lesson is, SUCK IT UP and just pretend it's a big band-aid on your heart, then rip it off and after they leave. I'll make Sam buy pizza for dinner to soften the pain.
My only hope is they leave before The Bachelorette starts. As much as I love my cats, this is THE SHOW I can't wait to see. I don't know why because it's a terrible show, but I DO enjoy tallying up how many times they say; “amazing” (surprisingly not many this season) and “the next level” (too early in the season for that) and Sam and I have a bet on who the winner will be, as long as it isn't Bentley. Yuck.
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Due to some technical difficulties, I couldn't post this last night when I had hoped. Today's update is: The adopters showed up, the cats showed well. Although it looked like ONLY Mac was going to be adopted, they saw how lovely and sweet Polly is and realized they loved her, too. Polly and Mac's adoption will take place on Friday, so the new family can have a long weekend together. Their new dad, Ed, works from home quite often, so they kitties will always have company, as well as each other and I get a few more days to enjoy with them. In fact, Polly is sleeping right next to me as I write this. Damn, I will miss them! Oh, and the adopters left just before The Bachelorette started! Thank you for that!
Being a foster mom to kittens is one of the most joyful things I've ever done. Yes, there's much work involved and some times it's very difficult and even heartbreaking. Yet, there are moments of bliss, sweetness and great love.
As someone who suffers from depression, I can say it helps keeps the blues away and reminds me that whatever bothers me or makes me feel badly is insignificant. It helps me forget about “me” and reminds me what is truly important-saving this fragile life in my hands. Seeing this creature through a journey, not only of survival, but one of thriving, of learning to love interacting with humans, know the joy of playing, instead of being fearful, so one day this animal will be ready for the next part of his or her path.
It's time to reflect on a very special girl-Polly Picklepuss. Polly was born in a cage in a shelter and at just three weeks of age, my group, Kitten Associates, rescued her and her family. Some of you already know Polly's story, but for the ones that don't-Polly got very sick after she left the shelter. What happened next will scar her for the rest of her life.
Polly and her family were hit with a terrible Herpes virus infection, which we might usually call an Upper Respiratory Infection. Most cats carry Herpes, but don't get sick from it. Kittens with a fragile immune system can't fight it off and being a virus, it's very difficult to treat. Many vets will treat with antibiotics to kill off any secondary infection, but it doesn't treat the virus. Sadly, no matter what we did, Polly kept getting sick. We even consulted and treated her homeopathically, but by then she'd had too many medications in her system. Looking back I would have handled it differently, but in the heat of the moment, between many trips to the vet and with Polly being so very sick, we threw everything we could at this illness-which at the time we did not even know what it was, and hoped she would survive.
At the worst of it, when we thought we were going to lose Polly, I made her a promise-that I would adopt her if she promised not to die. I would have done anything for her and her family and over the months I was tested over and over again.
It took months before Polly began to recover and sadly, as she got better, her sister, Cara began to show signs of being seriously ill. Cara's journey is still not over. She required much more care than any of us imagined. She is stable now, but her future is uncertain.
Polly has blossomed in the past seven months, from a tiny infant to a lovely young lady. Her medical issues are resolved, but due to her early illness she will always have runny eyes and bouts of sneezing. She eats well, her coat is like silk and she is one of the most affectionate cats I've ever worked with. Polly has been ready to leave me for over a month. I have been torn about the promise I made to her versus knowing it would not be wise for me to add another cat to my family of eight cats.
Polly gets along great with everyone. She's rarely in her room anymore and is well enough so that she can mingle with all the cats and have the run of the house. It's tough to sleep some nights because she likes to get nutty around 1am and by 2am she likes to sleep on Sam's chest or curled up by my head, on my pillow. She follows us around like a shadow and will stop suddenly and throw herself on the floor, innocently wanting a belly rub, but not realizing she's going to cause one of us to trip and break our head open. She can't help loving people as she does and I wouldn't have it any other way.
The problem is, I've spent too much time with Polly. I've never had foster cats here for almost eight months. Polly is part of the family, but now a new family is interested in adopting her. They're a very nice couple who have no other pets. Their cat died not long ago and they miss having a cat to love. I checked out their Vet reference and went to their home. I tried to find a reason that this wasn't a good match and I could not.
That's when it hits me hard-it's time. This day has been coming since the day I called to make arrangements to have Polly and her family rescued. I knew it when I made the call and I knew I would have to find a way to let her go when the time came. The day is almost here, but I don't want to let her go.
This is going to hurt-even thinking about it makes me cry, but Polly deserves to be spoiled and to have a lot more attention than she would ever get here. She should have a home she won't have to share with many other cats. She'll have a buddy with her and I would have to insist on that. Polly is too social to be an only cat.
I've worked very hard for Polly and her family and letting go of them is not easy. I'd like to say I can tell all of you how to foster cats and not be sad when they leave, not have second thoughts, not hope the adoption doesn't go through, but I can't do that. Fostering cats is filled with so much joy that it's tough to let that go. You have to have faith that you're doing the right thing for that cat. That they can be happy and thrive in another home. That your home isn't the only place in the world where they will be all right. That another family can give them just as much love, if not more.
I think you have to allow yourself to feel dreadful and not be afraid of FEELING that sting in your heart. If you don't suffer this, then those cats die. It's as simple as that. If you don't foster cats because you don't want to feel hurt, they don't make it out of the shelter alive. For me, tears and heartache over them leaving me is an easy price to pay compared to my tears over them never having a chance to even HAVE a life to live.
I guess my lesson is this: Be brave. Take a deep breath. Let it out slowly. Remember why you're doing this. Remember that although you will be sad and cry, it will pass. Keep saving more lives. Keep crying. One day you'll look back and realize you've saved hundreds of lives and had just as many tears, but you did it. You did it and you CAN DO IT AGAIN.
Tomorrow is the big day. If the adoption goes through, Polly will be on her way. The pain of saying goodbye will be multiplied because it's likely she will not be the only one to leave here tomorrow. One of the other fosters will be joining her.
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