I've gotten many emails and comments on our Facebook page about Bob. Every single one of them, supportive and loving-offering prayers and help, whatever it takes. It means so much to me, that I can't even write the words to express how I feel. I'm sitting here crying. I'm so touched and grateful. I honestly don't feel like I deserve it. I know everyone out there is having a tough time. Every single one of you has challenges and heartache. I wish I could share all the love and support I get right back with all of you.

Quite a few folks have asked me to put up a ChipIn widget for anyone who wants to kick in a few dollars to help me pay for Bob's Vet Bill, which right now is about $5000.00. I'm not looking for a handout, but I won't turn away these offers of help any more, either. Sam and I have had a Hell of a bad few years and lately we've both been terribly depressed, wondering if we will EVER see things improve.

I feel really awkward putting up this ChipIn, but for those of you who like my work and appreciate all the advice and support I've given back, then if you want to consider it as giving me a "tip" for my good efforts or my writing, or if you want to do it in honor or Bob, then this is the time to do it.

Whatever you do, don't do anything that will put YOU into trouble. If you want to skip one cup of take out coffee and donate that to Bob's bill, then that would be mighty fine by me. I don't expect to raise $5000.00, but heck, if someone is flush with cash and loves my work, heck I would just about faint if we hit a goal like that.

Anyway...here you go. ChipIn to your hearts content.

Thank you to Izzy and Ivy and Maria and so many others for asking me to do this and to all of you for caring about Bob-and me. It is a gift like no other.

One thing I really love about writing this Blog is all the great people I get to meet. Some are pen pals from across “the pond” and others I've had the pleasure of meeting in person. These folks have a varied background. Some times their jobs flat out surprise me and leave me in awe.

While I am sworn to secrecy over this person's identity, I can tell you she is a Forensic Graphologist, otherwise known as a Handwriting Analysis Expert. She contacted me last year about analyzing a handwritten note I'd posted on my blog. That lead to me sending her some “exemplars”-samples of handwriting for her to use to practice her craft. She likes to keep fresh and seeing the samples is also fun for her. I sent her mine, Sam's, some friends and family. She told me things that surprised me and shocked me. She was even able to tell me one person I know is “closeted” gay. When I talked to that person, that person indicated she was correct! I had NO idea! And no, I didn't care if the person was gay or not. Sheesh! It was that I had NO idea and the person's handwriting said it all! That was what was so interesting!

To think that the loops and shapes of our letters tell a story all their own is fascinating. With that in mind, months ago, I asked this person to look at the writing samples from a post (rant) I'd written about Koko the cat, who was dumped by her owner. My email fell into her Spam folder and she just found it yesterday! She wrote up her analysis, which I'll share with you, below.

These notes were regarding THIS post.

The gal who wrote the first note is youngish, I would guess early 20s.

I'm sorry to say that I think the writing is a kid's and here's why:

1. I don't think an adult could imitate the weird spacing, which is common for kids who don't have a lifetime of experience writing notes.

2. The "10 mins" he wrote looks childlike--I don't think an adult would know to make the numerals different sizes, like kids do.

3. The word "gob" for "job" isn't a misspelling an adult would use to throw someone off the track. Adults who misspell purposefully wouldn't use a real word in place of another word (homonyms excluded, of course)--they would just switch around a few letters.

4. The placement of the ":" between "from" and "Korey" is also an indication of someone youthful.

[Robin's note: this was the KICKER to me!!!]

The third note writer is definitely aware that they're behaving like an asshole, at least. No connections between letters within words, the personal pronoun "I" is demented and the "f" has a weird, duplicitous loop at the top.

What is wrong with people!!!!!!!!!!!

------------------------------------------

The good news is that within a day of my post going live, Elke, one of our readers CALLED ME and offered to adopted KoKo. The next morning, our beloved Bobby, drove Koko to her new home-a few HOURS away

!

Elke reports that Sophie (no more KoKo), is doing very well integrating into her home. There have been NO litterbox accidents..no peeing or pooping other than in her pan. Is Sophie sick? Heck no. She's fine. Not only is she fine, she is well loved and cared for and living a wonderful life with Elke and her family. What started out as a tragedy-in-the-making, turned out to be quite a happy tail and one that I was proud to be part of.

If Sophie could write, I just know her handwriting would certainly indicate that she is happy, confident, friendly...and relived her nightmare is over. I bet she'd dot her “i's” with smiley faces or hearts, too.

Dear Vet-Whoever-You-Are,

You are the lowest form of money-grubbing slug there ever was-what you did for a buck not only sickens me, it makes me FURIOUS! YOU SHOULD LOSE YOUR LICENSE!!!!! AND IF I KNEW WHO YOU WERE I WOULD SEND EVERYONE I KNOW AFTER YOUR BLOATED ASS TO TAKE A BIG CHUNK OUT OF IT!

Why am I so angry?

©2010 Robin A.F. Olson. Bobbi at Connie's house a few weeks ago.

Bobbi got returned to AID last week. That's really tragic and I'm VERY disappointed in her temporary adopter. They assured us they would GO SLOWY introducing Bobbi to their other cat, but they just couldn't manage it. They couldn't deal with Bobbi hissing-which is normal or the fact that Bobbi went after their other cat. Bobbi has only been in FIVE other temporary homes-each with many cats-over the past MONTH. Do you THINK that MAYBE she needed a few WEEKS to just get her bearings and TRUST in her surroundings? NO. You didn't wait or give her a chance. Like her family before, you gave up on her, too. Not great, but not the end of the world.

This is it. Sit DOWN in your CHAIR. Stop driving or whatever you are doing...

I got an email from Connie tonight. Bobbi has been doing great back at the shelter. Not fighting with the other cats. Getting along fine...then tonight...

BOBBI WENT INTO HEAT!

This cat is 2-3 YEARS OLD. Apparently she was OLD ENOUGH TO BE DECLAWED ON ALL FOUR PAWS, BUT FOR SOME REASON THIS “VET” DECIDED SHE WAS'T OLD ENOUGH TO BE SPAYED!!!!

WHAT THE...?!!!!!!!

I WANT TO HIT SOMETHING! NO. I WWANT TO HIT SOMEONE! NO! I WANT TO HIT THAT VET! I WANT TO PUNCH OUT WHOEVER TOSSED BOBBI TO THE CURB AND LET HER STARVE!!! I AM SO ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!! All I can do is type exclamation marks!!!!!

Did I go to sleep, then wake up in a parallel universe full of asshats? I mean, really? WHAT IS GOING ON IN THIS WORLD WHERE THIS MADE SENSE TO SOMEONE? Did the moron who owned Bobbi hold a GUN to the VET'S head and MAKE him declaw the cat? That is the ONLY explanation that makes any sense to me!

I think my head is going to explode.

Meanwhile, Miss Bobbi is going to be SPAYED very very soon-on our dime. No problem. Worth every penny.

As for the Vet...all I have to say is Karma is a BITCH.

As Hurricane Earl churns in the Atlantic, I sit and wait and wonder if it's going to behave and only give the folks here in Connecticut a glancing blow of high winds and torrential rain or if the weather reports will be wrong and Earl will take a devious leap west and blast us with its' Category 2 fury.

I realized that should we ever take a direct hit that I have nowhere to go that would allow cats-and certainly not foster cats that also have ringworm. I couldn't even put them in the car with the healthy cats.

I'd be forced to stay behind.

So Sam and I got up at 6AM. This was not my idea of a good time. No one should get up until at least 9AM and 10AM would be even better. Anyway, we wanted to get to the grocery store and buy some non-perishable items like pudding cups, nuts, chocolate covered raisins. You know-important things that will keep us healthy if we lose power—which happens if you fart too hard around here. We expect the power will go out-which also means, no WATER.

We live in a house where everything is run by electricity-including the pump that goes to our 390' deep well. That means no shower and NO FLUSHING. Not fun. We have those 5 gallon bottles of water and a dispenser. Some of the bottles are empty so we filled them with tap water. Ah ha! Now we will be able to flush, though holding a 40 pound jug of water, aiming over the toilet tank, then hoping you don't miss and dump it all over the floor or miss and get it into the toilet BOWL, which would splatter whatever was currently IN the bowl all over the walls.

Gosh, I hope the power doesn't go out tomorrow. I just don't think there's enough bleach in the world to clean my walls after that.

As I wait to find out if my little house in the woods is going to be decimated by Hurricane Earl, I thought I'd catch you up on a BUNCH of news...in no particular order...

1. HOPE IS OUT OF THE ANIMAL HOSPITAL!

Her leg, HELLO!, is HEALED! She will walk just fine. She beat the infections, but traded them off for a cold. That said she is well enough now to go into foster care. I heard her foster home is terrific and her rescuers, called The Cat Women, should be getting a check from me via Sweetwater Vet Hospital, to cover ALL of HOPE's medical bills! There will be a bit left over and that will go into a fund to help other cats who need vet care.

HOPE has a new name: Ariel. This will mark her new journey. In a very strange coincidence, Ariel's foster mom is none other than Mary Jo-who is the subject of item number 2!

2. BIG, ORANGE MAINE COON IS SAFE!

Big Orange's owner is a senior citizen with dementia who cannot care for her cat and whose (jerkwad) of a son refuses to allow the cat in the house! The poor cat has been attacked by local (equally jerky) kids. Mary Jo (sound familiar?) stepped up to help rescue this big lug. When news got out about his troubles lots of folks chimed in, willing to help. I got the word out to my rescue babes and one of them offered to give him a home. I can't say more than that because the details aren't worked out, but even if not, Big Orange is SAFE. Mary Jo got him today only to find out the (jerkwad of the century) son now wants to get a puppy since the cat is gone. Is there no justice for this cat? Perhaps a wonderful life in a better home will do the trick?

©2010 Mary Jo. Her original poster trying to find help for Big Orange.

3. RINGWORM. WE HAVE A WINNER! (or is that LOSER?)

There aren't enough swear words to cover how I feel about Pattycake getting ringworm. She had it in transport, but only a tiny dot on her ear. I didn't even NOTICE what you see below. Granted the area was shaved after Dr. Larry's Vet Tech, Mighty Lauren found it!

©2010 Robin A.F. Olson. Fungus Amongus.

And of course, a few days later I felt some "crud" on her brother, Moonpie's ear so he's got it, too. Both cats are in the bathroom for eternity, or another month. Then they will be 5 months old and even harder to find a forever home for. If this is as bad as it gets I will be grateful. If the 4 little kittens in the foster room get it, too...that will be really bad...if my cats get it...well...not good...not good at all.

©2010 Robin A.F. Olson. They share everything...ugh.

4. Bob has a URI. Spencer has really bad feline acne that I just can't get rid of, Nicky PEED on the floor right in front of us so he's at the Vet getting tests done and poor Gracie's dermatitis just won't go away!

©2010 Robin A.F. Olson. Bob. No fever but sneezing and coughing. My poor baby!

This is why having TWO cats is nice. If one gets sick, no problem. If both got sick, no problem! When they ALL start to get sick? PROBLEM! Having EIGHT CATS is NOT FOR SOMEONE WITH A WEAK CONSTITUTION-which is WHY I should have TWO CATS!

4. Jasper County Animal Control STILL NEEDS A FEW MORE CATS RESCUED SO THEY WON'T HAVE TO PUT ANY KITTIES DOWN. BUT...

Thanks to Barb Lowe at Winging Cat Rescue and two other rescue groups, five cats from Jasper were saved, along with three others from Douglas and eight by our friend Joan Flores in TN, along with six from Heard County and three more who were supposedly rescued but their rescue DUMPED THEM!!!!!...so they were RE-RESCUED!

©2010 Jasper Co. Animal Control. This is Frances.

That's 25 MORE CATS SAVED!!!

©2010 Jasper Co. Animal Control. This is Maybelline.

©2010 Jasper Co. Animal Control. This is Saber. Yay Saber!

Yes, there's a price for rescuing all these cats. Barb needs Scotch and a vacation somewhere quiet AND she needs $400.00 to cover transport. Let's show her how we can help her money woes disappear and thank her for all her hard work, saving these babies!

5. My little kittens are pushing three pounds a piece, except for Cinnie-Minnie who is just a tiny little thing.

Oh, and they're super cute, but I don't get to spend nearly enough time with them!

©2010 Robin A.F. Olson. From left to right: Yodel, Sugar Pie, Honey B. and Cinnamon.

6. Little Maria WILL be having her surgery next week! Stay tuned for LOTS MORE NEWS ABOUT THIS BIG EVENT FOR A LITTLE KITTY!

That is if my power doesn't go out tomorrow...and Earl keeps his distance.

UPDATE: Hope is NOT DOING WELL. She IS at Sweetwater, but the infection in her leg is not improving. She may lose her leg. Her kidney values are poor. They are trying to raise at LEAST $600 for her care but undoubtedly, she will need more than that...she could also use some prayers and good wishes.

WARNING: GRAPHIC PHOTO BELOW

A little kitten named Hope is just 3-4 months old. She's languishing from a serious infection due to a traumatic injury. She is HALF the weight she should be for her age. We need to raise funds for her AS SOON AS WE CAN. I don't have a Chip In Widget for them, but they DO ASK FOR DONATIONS TO BE SENT TO:

Sweetwater Creek Animal Clinic

2785 Lee Rd.

Lithia Springs. GA 30122

678-838-7387

From my contact in Georgia, she tells us some background of what happened:

No: 4615 Name: HOPE Age: 3-4 months old

This poor little kitty arrived at the shelter on 8/12 with a large fish hook threaded through her lower stomach and into her upper leg. She was taken to the vet, and it was removed.

Unfortunately, Hope is not eating or drinking and really needs 'round the clock care to help pull her through the trauma of this experience.

We have no idea how this happened to her but it's heartbreaking to see those weak, pleading-for-help eyes, and know that she really needs someone to hand-feed, and give her the time and attention she needs to help raise her low spirits.

If you can help this little girl by providing a FOSTER HOME or are with a RESCUE GROUP THAT CAN PROVIDE CARE for her while she recovers from her injury, please contact:

Pat Hopper - Douglas County Transporterpnh1918@aol.com

Home: 770-577-7743 Cell: 404-725-0393

Please help me spread the word about getting this kitten the funding she needs to survive! I realize that calling a Vet to offer a donation or taking the time to write a check and mail it is a pain in the butt, but this kitten deserves our time and effort. I sure hope you can all pitch in to help this little one!

As always...THANK YOU for spreading the word!

Rest in peace, sweet angel.

Jill had a seizure today. Was it due to her poor body condition? She was skin and bones, after all. She was abandoned by her owner when she moved away. The woman's roomate gave her up to Henry County-just passing off what she considered a problem...an inconvenience...a cost...to the County.

Since Jill was emaciated, it's very likely no one even bothered to feed her for a long time, or fed her food that wasn't appropriate for a cat. Perhaps Jill had an underlying problem that was amplified by lack of nutrition or perhaps Jill was a senior cat. We will never know the cause. We will never know more than she did not recover after her seizure. Since there is no Vet on staff, nor money to get her to a Vet, she was euthanized.

Could she have been saved? I don't honestly know. I know that even in her last day, Betsy remarked that she LOVED this girl and that this pretty tux was very loving right back to her. Is it some comfort to us to know this? I'm not even sure it is.

Anyone who reads this blog, probably loves cats dearly and we would easily agree that this cat, like so many others, is not trash to be tossed to the curb and left to slowly die. She knew love from Betsy and the other volunteers at the Shelter, but their hands are often tied. There is little they can do. They have no money for flea treatments, and barely any for food or litter, how can they afford Vet care that we take for granted?

I'm so sorry to tell you all this sad news after we just enjoyed a happy ending for KoKo-now Sophie, but we all know that this is the fate more often than not, of most cats who are taken to municipal shelters.

...and until we can find a solution, there will be more sad stories to come.

I'm sick and tired of assholes dumping their “problem” cats upon innocent animal shelters, Vets, mom & pop rescue groups. They're all targets for COWARDS, who refuse to STEP UP and DO the RIGHT THING for their animals. Instead, under the cover of darkness, they sneak up to the door of these places, DUMP their dog or cat, then take off. Some times they leave a note. I bet it's to make them feel better for the shitty thing they're about to do. “Well, I'll leave a note so they'll be sure to know I'm DUMPING the cat, not that the cat got left her by some freak accident.”

This afternoon, I was contacted by our friend, Betsy at Henry County Care & Control in McDonough, GA. She had just finished crying. Betsy has been helping rescue animals from Henry County for decades. She's seen it all and more, yet she's still brokenhearted by people's cruelty to animals.

A cat named KoKo, was brought to Henry County via Animal Control. On Saturday, the cat was DUMPED at the doorstep of a local Vet. They weren't even OPEN so the cat sat there for a day in a crate in the blistering heat! Once the Vet found the cat, they called Animal Control and now the poor thing is on Death Row at HCACC. They are full up! They don't have room to add countless animals to their facility.

KoKo is a brown tabby. Nothing exotic. Not a cute little kitten. Just another cat, whose owners are scum of the Earth. Now this cat has a few days left to live. She can compete for the very few available placements with a rescue or hope that some kind soul will adopt her and give her a DECENT home.

Why did the cat get dumped? Was she aggressive? NO! Was she...I don't know. I can't THINK of any reasons why I'd give up my CATS!!!! I would work with them to find out how to fix whatever behaviors they exhibit that bother me-even if they're doing what is natural to them. Sure, it's tough when the cat pees on the floor, or worse, on your clothes or bed, but when you figure out WHY, then it's better not only for you, but for the cat, too.

So KoKo had little cutesy-pie notes in her carrier. If you read them, your head will burn up and explode...okay, maybe not, but you'll certainly see the bullshit from a mile away and your blood pressure will go up for sure!

This so called “family” adopted KoKo when she was a kitten, since they know her birthday. Oh boy, they drove an entire hour and a half to get her, but apparently, when things didn't work out, they couldn't drive a few minutes to a f-ing VET!

Ahh, the good old “we can't afford the Vet” line-another classic. Did you try to TALK to your VET and work something out? I bet if you got off your lazy, selfish ass you might have found out that the Vet would have taken small payments over time or given you a break, but apparently, that long long, exhausting drive must have been the ONLY thing you did to make an effort for your cat. It's just TOO MUCH to ask that you, the caretaker of this animal, decide that the best thing to do is NOT ask ANY local rescue for help, NOT contact ANYONE, just tip toe up to the door of the Vet, like a common thief and dump your cat! SHAME ON YOU!

I love the way the note is written first hand, as though poor KoKo had written the plea for help, herself. Look at the charming little postscripts! How nice to tell the VICTIM (Vet) who found her that she had some shots. You're so (NOT) nice! Who wouldn't just LOVE the person who wrote this CRAP!!!

What a faux-thoughtful letter. What nice handwriting. It must have taken hours of careful preparation to write this CRAP. You're not fooling anyone-COWARD!

Poor KoKo. Scared and dumped in a cage. She has no idea what she did to deserve this fate.

If KoKo really HAD written the note, I think this is what she would have said:

Dear Vet,

I got adopted by real assholes. They feed me lousy food and pay me little attention. One of them kicks me if I do anything they don't like, so I'm not so sure I can trust people. I'm not very happy where I live, in fact, I hate it. I've been feeling sick for a long time and they ignore me. I tried to get their attention by pooping on the floor, but they just yelled and rubbed my nose in it. I started peeing, too, but that was because my bladder burns real bad and I can't hold it in. I wish they would feed me better food and take me to the cat doctor so I could feel good again.

When no one cared about me, I finally gave up and just pooped and peed everywhere I could. One of them said he would kill me, so the other one said she would “deal with me” whatever that means.

So here I am, at your doorstep. I guess I got away from those horrible people, but now I'm in a jam. I don't have a place to live and I heard if I don't have one, either I will slowly starve to death living outdoors or I will be put to death at those places where they keep all the animals people give up on. I wish I could talk. I would only tell you that if you could help me feel better, I would be such a good friend to you. I would give you kisses and sleep on your lap and tell you I love you, in my way, but something tells me, maybe it's too late for me...

...but at least I'm away from those assholes.

Sincerely yours,

KoKo

P.S. Please change my name so I can forget my awful past.

--------------------------------------------------------

But wait! There's more! One note was simply not enough! Betsy believes this one was probably written by the same person, but used the hand they don't normally write with so it looks like a kid wrote it. If a kid really DID write this, then their parents should be tossed in JAIL for abuse!

The bullshit parade continues! Maybe if they spent the time it took to write these notes to CALL their VET and work something out, this would not have happened!

“TO WHOEVER WROTE THIS:" YOU SUCK.

Betsy tells me that KoKo has PERFECT litter box habits. She's probably not sick and if she had a behavior issue with the other cats she lived with, that could have been resolved-IF ANYONE HAD BOTHERED TO GET OF THEIR LAZY ASS AND TRY TO HELP THIS CAT.

SO...

WE NEED TO FIND A RESCUE PLACEMENT OR ADOPTER FOR THIS POOR, 2 year old CAT. INFO ON HOW TO HELP HER IS BELOW. As always, go with your heart. If you can't help her out, then help get the word out to everyone you know. Let's show KoKo that not all people SUCK-just the ones she lived with.

PLEASE REFER TO THIS ID# 8/16-3406 when contacting HCC&C.

Nice tabby “M” I see! Lovely girl!

We are very rescue friendly and are more than happy to work with any rescue group as long as the group has a valid Georgia Department of Agriculture license! Any rescue group, whether in or out of state, that takes pets from Georgia shelters, is required, by Georgia law, to have a rescue license issued by the Georgia Department of Agriculture's Animal Protection Division. Having tax exempt status is not the same as a license. For more information on obtaining a license, please call (404) 656-4914.

Contact:

mystiblu@bellsouth.net

Henry County Animal Care and Control

527 Hampton Street

McDonough, Georgia 30253

(770) 288-7401

http://www.petfinder.com/shelters/GA67.html

Our Hours:

Monday-Friday: 9 am-4:30 pm

Saturday: 9 am-1 pm

Sunday: Closed

County Observed Holidays: Closed

The shelter is located at 527 Hampton Street in McDonough. We are located south of Atlanta off I-75. Take exit 218 and head east on 20/81 toward McDonough. Our address is 527 Hwy 20/81 East.

For all other information regarding ordinances, county codes, and other functions of Henry County Animal Care and Control please visit www.hcacc.org

UPDATE: A number of good people have offered to provide donations to sponsor KoKo if she's given a good foster home or placement at a never-Kill shelter. If you're with a rescue group and can help her, contact me and I'll send donations your way. info@coveredincathair.com

It was purely coincidence that we ran an article about the forgotten cats at Animals in Distress, a small local shelter that's been struggling to find donations, volunteers and adopters. We profiled Gizmo, one of the sweet adults available for adoption. He was being mercilessly picked on by Moose, one of the other cats at the shelter. Luckily for Gizmo, just as we posted the article about him, one of the volunteers fell in love with him and decided to take him home. Hopefully he will blend in well with the other kitties in the family and if it all works out, Giz has a place to stay for life.

I love hearing about adults getting a good home, but of course, just as Gizmo leaves, an apple-head Siamese named Clive, was given up by his owners. Carole, the President of A.I.D. could not turn him away. She knew he deserved a chance at find a great home. The reason he was surrendered? Not that he's mean or unfriendly. NO. They're MOVING and “can't take him.”

I don't understand that and never will. If you adopt an animal and you move, you take it with you. You don't leave your KIDS or your Partner behind when you move do you? You don't, on purpose, move to an apartment that does not allow pets, right? If they say NO to pets, then you find somewhere else to live? I'm not solving world peace here. Come on. This excuse is really getting tiresome to hear-and I seem to be hearing it every day.

I'm starting to wonder if we, who do rescue, make it easier for people to dump their pets. Think about it. If all rescues said "NO!" when someone pulls the "moving" or "no pets" excuse, then maybe they would step up and take responsibility for their pets for the LIFE of that pet, not just until the novelty wears off?

I know. Who am I kidding?

Sometimes I just want to slap people. Not you. Of course.

Sam and I have a running joke. Often, we'll be watching mind-numbing tv shows about "real" life murder mysteries. Nine times out of ten, the narrator says; "We'll never really know for sure..." This is after we spent an HOUR of our time watching and wondering how the story will end. To hear it's "we'll never really know" not only defeats the entire purpose of watching the show in the first place, it also pisses me off good!

If I'm going to waste my time in front of the TV, I need RESOLUTION (pardon the pun).

So my dear Spencer and I went to visit Dr. Larry. I was fully prepared for him to give me shit about ripping out my own cat's fur, that I'm a stupid pet owner and it's nothing to worry about-other than being stupid makes me worry. I just wasn't careful enough removing Spencer's mats and "baldness happens."

Dr Larry didn't let me down. After a few minutes pretending he was calling the "authorities" to report me for abusing my cat, he sat down to take a good look.

The two, nearly symmetrical bald patches don't have any crusting or oozing. They're both about 2 x 3 inches. The skin is pink. Spencer doesn't seem to be itchy. Dr. Larry turned off the lights. We weren't alone so there was no hope for a makeout session. Dang! Oh, he was just using the Wood's Lamp to check for...oh shit...RINGWORM!

The smile on my face weakened into a razor straight line. I kept thinking; Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! NOT RINGWORM!!!!!!

I looked while Dr. Larry was talking. He saw some slightly reflective scaly areas that were tiny. One of the bald spots had a slight pale white edge to it.

Well? Was it RINGWORM?

"We can't really be sure right now."

SHIT! It's like watching 48 Hrs! Change the channel! Change the channel!

With no better programming available, I was stuck in an answerless void. Dr. Larry removed a few of Spencer's hairs and placed them into a vial with some goop in it (that is a technical term; goop). The test for ringworm takes 2-3 WEEKS. Meanwhile, there is nothing else to be done. We decided to run a full blood panel to rule out hypothyroid (even if it's rare in most cats, I've already had one cat who had it and Dr. Larry knows my cats get weird stuff-it's almost a rule). Plus, Spencer is due for a dental in January AND we can also check his BUN because now that we know he's a purebred Weegie (well, sort of), we're going to watchout for polycystic kidney disease, too. See? I'm smart! I know stuff! I spent $220 on the Vet visit. Wait? Is that smart? Not so sure.

Spencer did not care to have his blood drawn, as usual, but this time Super Deb showed me she still had all her fingers attached to her hand, after the blood draw was finished. The only injury was to the towel they restrained Spencer with. It had to be put down due to it being ripped to shreds.

So am I a stupid pet owner?

We'll never really know for sure...

It doesn't suprise anyone that I want to do the BEST I can for each of my "resident" cats, as well as my fosters, but it isn't always possible. I realize that having seven cats (plus God knows how many fosters) means that each cat might not get everything they need every day. Sure, they get FED daily, and if I'm not feeling too lazy, I slug their water fountain over to the sink to rinse it out every few days (and they get a small bowl of fresh water every day, too). I try to play with the cats and give them each, at least a few minutes of my time. Some get more than others. Some gravitate to Sam, so that lightens the load a bit, but it has to be tough on the cats-especially Gracie and Petunia.

Gracie came to me six years ago as an "unwed Mother" with her three offspring. Because I had trouble placing her and her daughter, Petunia, I decided I had room in my home to keep them. I never really had a strong bond with them, but I also didn't want to continue trying to find them homes after almost a year. I was with the wrong rescue group who put my kitten on the back burner, until she was too big to be attractive to many families, and both of the cats were skittish and showed poorly.

Over the years, Petunia has developed territorial aggression and some aggression towards a few of the other cats. She did a lot of inappropriate urination, which drove me mad. Getting a consult with a behaviorist, seeing my Vet, reading about cat behavior, I came to be able to work with Petunia, to a point. Clearly, she feels she is not getting enough attention and does not care to have other cats in "her" space-like my bedroom. I've worked on giving her more attention and playtime, but, again, with the duties of a foster mom and the other cats having their issues, there isn't a lot of time for her. It's my fault.

Meanwhile, it's been a YEAR since Gracie began her odyssey with Miliary Dermatitis, possibly brought on by her own high strung emotional state. Gracie will RUN if anyone comes close to her. Partly it was from all the medications and baths she's gotten over the past year, partly because she is a nervous cat. She's been pulling out her fur, over grooming herself and vomiting it up. I haven't seen her pull her fur, but there are clear signs something is going on. Even with all this, Gracie STILL wants to sleep near me at night and still wants attention, but is fearful if I step closer to pet her.

Dr. Larry says to re-home the both of them. As I've written before, they are 6 and 9 years old. It would be VERY tough to find them a home I'd feel was good enough to care for them. I'd also miss them. They do have some adorable qualities! I just wish they could relax...

So, after all this time, I've decided to try one last thing-Elavil. Yes, my cats are on anti-anxiety meds. Here I am, studying cat behavior, trying to help other people with their cats, when my own are so messed up I finally decided to medicate them. Surely, there is another way? Surely if there is, I'm not sure what it would be at this point.

I started Gracie on 10mg, once per day. In two days, whatever existed of Gracie's personality was gone. She was lifeless and very depressed. She didn't run off, but she seemed to lose interest in life. She ate like a pig, but stayed by herself, not wanting to be around anyone else. I could not get near her. I took her off the meds for a week, spoke with Super-Deb, the Vet tech, and decided to halve the dose and see if that helped.

Right around this time, I was seeing more and more aggression from Petunia towards Nora-who was doing NOTHING, just minding her own business. Unprovoked attacks on the rise, another call to Super-Deb and we agreed it was time to put Petunia on the other half dose.

Both girls have been on the half dose for a week now. Gracie is perky, eating well, wants to be close to me, but is still nervous. Her skin improved with a shot of vetalog and I'm waiting to see if it STAYS that way now she's not so nervous. So far, so good. Just a tiny outbreak, but not bad. She likes to visit me at night and purrs and like her pets, she's just not quite so stressed out.

Petunia seemed more clingy to her mom, but also seemed to be less high strung. I thought it was going all right, but in the past day she's actually gotten MORE aggressive towards Nora. Is she fighting her "mellow" feelings by overcompensating her attacks? I put her on the full 10mg dose today to see if that makes a difference.

My hope is to give it a month and re-evaluate. If the girls are doing better, I may continue it another month or may wean them off it slowly. I want them to gain confidence and reduce aggression or self-multilation. I WANT THEM TO BE HAPPY, but the price they have to pay to get there is the problem. I hope, in the end, it's worth it. Right now it feels like I'm running out of options. This is my last chance to make it work for them to continue living here.